Tuesday 31 January 2012

Why I Like...Sarah Gregory

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No spanking at all...this just makes me laugh!

Just a quick middle of the night in England post; if you are an attentive reader you will have noticed that I have taken down the spanking orientation poll.

I had intended to replace it with a different poll but the general lack of interest in it has made me think again; I can't decide if very few people bothered because it was a lame question or whether they would prefer not to complete any poll.

I will give this some thought.

Anyway, the reason for the current post; the kitten covers

Go on, click on the link; this website it the product of an original but obviously deranged mind, who thinks it is cute to replace the figures on classic album covers with pictures of, well, kittens.

You know what? I think she's right. And pretty damn clever too. These just make me laugh. And there are lots there to look at.

I'll be back in a few hours, at a time when decent people are abroad (which just leaves the nasty kinky people like you and I at home) with the next one in my model appreciation series Why I Like...

I won't tell you who the US model is, but there are some really great pictures to go with it. And no pussies. Well, no cats anyway (I know, awful crude joke , but I'm tired and my resistance to horrible puns is terribly low).

See you at a sane time.

All the best


This is not a love song. Er, website review. Northern Spanking.

Welcome in out of the cold once more my friends. Blow a nice warming breath onto your blue tinged fingers, and pull a stool up around the fire. You'll soon warm up.

So, are you sitting comfortably? Then I'll begin; I have a little story to tell you.

As regular readers may recall a few weeks back I referred to Northern Spanking as my current favourite paysite, and promised a review in the near future.

More recently I contacted Paul at Northern Spanking, to advise him of my intention to produce a full review; he politely asked if I would mind holding off as they are currently planning a major revamp of the website, which is looking a little old. Naturally I agreed to this most reasonable request, and, rest assured, once the work has been undertaken, I will produce a proper assessment of the new look site.

For now though I had promised a look at Northern Spanking, and I intend to give you a flavour of just why I do enjoy it so much; I'd hate to disappoint any of you perched there eagerly on the edge of your seats!

So, a little background; NS is a long established site, with masses of material. The oldest items currently hosted there date back to June 2003.

The early entries are all photo galleries, which show a good deal of invention. The move to producing videos was made around 12 months later, the first being Sunstroke, with Morgan Taylor and Sam Jones. Since then they have continued to produce a mix of stills and live action updates.

The site updates more or less daily, with most videos being in 3 or 4 parts. The earliest ones are available for download in WMV, although the majority are in the better MP4 format. File sizes vary widely; the largest I can recall downloading being 379 meg for a 13 minute video.

Picture and sound quality are fine, and virtually all videos are shot with multiple angles. The clips are very well edited, with a nice smooth flow, and a good structure.

Having said that most videos have multiple parts there is a series of stand alone clips which are collected under the banner of SSS - short sharp shocks. These are videos with little build up before the action gets underway, and they often seem to have been suggested by the models themselves.

Who are the models? The site boasts that they do not use professionals, just girls who are into spanking. This may have been true in the early days but now a number of the better known UK based spanking models appear.

Actually the list of spankees is comprehensive; all of the names you might hope to see appear (Amelia Jane Rutherford, Leia-Ann Woods, Pandora Blake, Kami Robertson, Jadie Reece, Jean Bradley, Lucy McLean and Elizabeth Simpson for example) do so, along with a large number of spankees I've only ever seen here. There are also a number of US guest stars ( such as Sarah Gregory, Erica Scott, Niki Flynn and Zille Defeu).

Looking over the list on the site I now feel guilty for all of the other great spanking models I haven't mentioned; there really are a lot of great spankees here.

I'm not sure exactly how many separate videos there are but I have over 28 gig of downloads from the site, and there is still stuff that I haven't gotten to yet, not to mention the huge number of still galleries which do not relate to any of the films.

There are a number of videos which feature a pretty much original premise, no mean feat with the number produced; I love the fairy godmother clip, and the hilarious twins video. There's a great cat burglar one with Niki Flynn and two delightful Democracy in Action stories with Sascha Harvey. I could spend all day listing particular favourites, but I think I'll just leave it with a note that there is masses of entertaining stuff.

Spankings tend to start off mild, over clothing, but building up in intensity; there is a wide variety of implements used, including canes, slippers, tawses (to both hands and bottoms) and, of course, the trusty hand. There is also, mainly in the older material, some BDSM and lesbian stuff (a lot of which stars the divine Miss Woods). The site designers go out of their way to warn subscribers whenever there is anything other than straight spanking material present.

The majority of videos are M/F, but there is also a significant amount of F/F. The spankers are generally very good, and in fact two of the better UK male tops feature extensively (Stephen Lewis and Paul Kennedy). The two primary female tops are Lucy McLean and Amy Hunter, both of who are great.

The overriding feel of the videos here is that the participants are having fun. This it the type of intangible factor that is hard to back up, but it's not hard to see. In particular there are a large number of outtakes provided which suggest it.

Each of the spankees featured is encouraged to write a few words about themselves, and they often comment on how much they have enjoyed their involvement. The fact that so many models make repeated return appearances suggests a comfortable working environment, and the vast majority of clips seem somehow to be good humoured.

This is in addition to the fun videos that use actual humour.

So there you have it; great fun videos with a wonderful range of spanking stars; why wouldn't you like the site? I have no idea. Go on, give it a try why don't you? The recurring cost is around £16.75 per month (US$24.95) and there really is more material than any other site I know.

Northern Spanking - it may be grim up North but at least there are warm bottoms to cheer us up!

All the best


Monday 30 January 2012

New feature! My favourite scenes.

Hullo, and welcome back, to the show that never ends!

Take a seat in the Big Top; the clowns will be along presently, once their tiny car has been serviced. Ah, repaired, that is. No kinky car sex here please!

We promise you thrills, spills and chills, as out highly skilled acrobats gambol across the skies, risking life and limb in the name of popular entertainment.

Right then; glad I got that out of my system. And now, to resume our normal service...

Whilst I have a lot of different pieces in the pipeline, I had nothing actually ready to go today. Idle fingers and a keyboard are the Devil's playthings (without the keyboard they tend to lead to masturbation, and there's nothing evil about that), and so, after nearly 18 seconds of constructive thought, here is the first in a new series.

At the end of my review of My Spanking Roommate I listed several favourite episodes, and I thought it might be interesting to talk about why a particular video works for me.

I'm not saying that it will be interesting for you to read about it, mind.

Still, there are those pretty pictures; always give the public what they want, don't you know.

Is it just me or is the style of this piece all over the place today? Um. Regional stuff. Upper crust. Maybe the odd moment that lowers the tone.

I have several of these things loosely planned, with videos from a number of different producers. However, for now, I'll start with my absolute favourite from MSR - episode 36.

This features two performers; the incredible and gorgeous Snow Mercy, who is eye catching as either top or bottom, and Dee Dee, about whom I know absolutely nothing. Never seen her before.

The story briefly; Kay phones and asks Dee Dee to pass on a message to Snow, that she wants her to be her bodyguard while she spanks another girl. Instead Dee Dee tells Snow that
Kay wants her to spank Snow, which she does, at some length, with hand and hairbrush.

Kay then phones back and speaks to Snow, who, upon getting the real story, turns the tables and spanks Dee Dee.

This video works especially well for me for three specific reasons:-

1. It pushes my buttons, in that it's two attractive girls spanking each other OTK. I love OTK, and I love turn about stories.

2. The performances, which are extremely well judged; their tone is
perfect for the piece, which is fairly tongue in cheek throughout. Dee Dee in particular is very entertaining - I love her "No, I have a tender ass!" line, delivered in a slightly quavery high pitched voice.

3. The overall sense of fun; yes, there are two decent spankings, but no one really gets hurt. The costumes, worn for a party, are ridiculous but great for spanking. The girls seem comfortable with each other; it's easy to believe that they are friends and roommates. There is a lightness of tone here which contrasts massively with the sense of threat so often pervading spanking clips.

I suppose if you're a big fan of the Dallas Spanks Hard school of strictly disciplinary beatings this all looks rather mild, and perhaps not worth your time. That may be, but I always enjoy spankings at the milder end of the spectrum (hurt but no harm), and this is just so goddamn good natured.

Yeah, I think that's it. The whole thing is good natured; nothing vicious or cruel. Two friends basically fucking around.

The performers are having fun, and the camera faithfully records this; there is no attempt to make it more than it is.

Whilst the models obviously take a huge amount of the credit for the entertainment value of this piece the producer/writer must also be acknowledged, for a job very well done.

Like all of the videos on MSR this is very professionally produced, using simple but realistic sets.

I really really like it (ya think? Two reallies? Ah, is that the correct plural. Can you have a plural form of an adverb? Ah shit, sorry, back to the
random waffle again).
So anyway, I regret to inform you that there are going to be at least 2 more of these; the next clip discussed will be from Northern Spanking, featuring Amelia Jane Rutherford, Lucy McLean and Stephen Lewis, and it's one of my favourites of all time.

Okay, enough already. I have to go and clean the patio doors now and then I want to whip up a large pan of my delicious corn beef hash for breakfasts for this week (and I don't even like corn beef!).

See you around.

All the best


All pictures are from My Spanking Roommate (although I'm sure that you guessed that), and, now that I look at them again, they really should be presented in reverse order.


Saturday 28 January 2012

Tim's Rules for Blogging

So, something a little different today; these are my self imposed rules for blogging. I'm not saying that these are the rules all bloggers should adhere to. They are just the ones that I try to stick with, most of the time.

And yes, I am a bit of a hypocritical son of a bitch (hey, careful how you talk about my Mom, sonny!) and have broken several of these already. Ah hell, I'll probably break most of the rest of them, given time. At least I'll try to acknowledge what I've done.

For all of you who don't give a damn about my opinion (please see rule no. 2) I've added some nice spanky pictures, once again courtesy of my good friends at Northern Spanking.

So then, onwards:-

1. Don't post angry. I did that once. Posted about no one answering my poll. Had a good old rant. Net result? Sod all.

2. Lighten up; this is only a blog, for fuck's sake, and odds on no one gives a stuff about your opinions.

3. Lots of pretty pictures please - 85% of readers are only here for the titillation factor (figures provided by the Commission Against Numbering Exhibitionists, in a survey of approximately 1 brain; there might be a slight allowance made for error in poll gathering of around 100%).

4. Don't be afraid; post whatever you want, irrespective of whether you think your readers will like it or not.

5. Don't chase numbers; oh, so tempting! I lost approximately 20% of my pageviews when I reviewed Strict Women (no, I didn't make that figure up, it's numerically accurate), and for a while I regretted the post. In retrospect I'm glad I made it, and I would do so again.

6. Don't get too full of yourself; readers come and readers go. Whoops. Certainly been guilty of that recently.

7. Be ambitious and reach out to people; this blog was originally intended mainly to host my stories, but now it has become much more than that, partly because I have made contact with a number of industry figures (I'm not sure that this is the right phrase - is there really a spanking industry?)

8. Be polite; no one wants a flame war. Well okay, some people do. Not me though.

9. Be honest and state your bias; you can get away with most things provided you are open and up front about them. Well, apart from being a Man Utd fan.

10. Have fun; if you're not enjoying producing your blog what the fuck are you here for?

11. Don't post drunk; slurred words are never funny in print

12. Don't post late at night; ah, alright, post whenever you get the chance. Most of my stuff is done late at night.

13. No fucking swearing! Use good old demotic Anglo-Saxon only. In all seriousness swear if you want to, but be aware that some readers may find it objectionable. And then see rules 4 and 5. And 10 probably.

14. Worship at the altar of Chross (and who knew that there were so many spankos in Germany? My third highest readership comes from there, and it's around 50% of my UK figure. Not bad for a country using a different language. Danke schon. Sorry, can't do the umlaut).

15. All of the above is subject to negotiation - does this mean I can ignore my own rules without being a hypocrite?

Ah, so what?

All the best
And may the kinks be with you (hey, Ray Davies is looking for you!)


Coming Attractions...um, not meant as a pun, honest!

Well, hullo there! Back again, eh? Nice to see you; I trust that the weekend is treating you well.

Did you have a nice lie in this morning? Did your better half bring you a nice cup of tea in bed?

Did your team get knocked out of the Cup? Mine bloody did!

Hrmm. Well. On to better things.

So I've had a busy day or so, largely thanks to my review of Dreams of Spanking, and Chross adding me to his Spankings of the Week (no, that's not bragging - if you're here you probably know all of that anyway).

The volume of pageviews has zoomed up, and the number of comments has increased too. I always try to leave sensible responses to any comments made, and, given the dizzy state of my mind, that can be a challenge.

I must say that I am extremely pleased by the standard of comments this blog does receive; they are thoughtful and address the issues raised, rather than just the prurient "cor, look at her arse!" crap that I suppose I do leave myself open to with the pictures
that I choose to post. So, thanks you to each and everyone of you who have me a line.

So, in honour of me having a lot of fun with my blog (isn't that the best reason to do stuff, ever?) I have been trying to set up a few different things, as well as more of the same.

A couple of weeks ago I commented on the Northern Spanking site, saying it was probably my favourite paysite, and promising a review; well, look shortly for my non-review of the site! There really is a good reason for that.
I'll cover it in my post (and many thanks to them for the delightful photos that accompany this one; cheers Paul!).

Coming up shortly I have an interview with one of my fellow bloggers, a gentleman who started his blog around the same time that I started this one, and who has some interesting things to say about his somewhat different experience of the spanking lifestyle.

I'm currently preparing a set of questions for an interview with one of
the biggest names in US spanking video production, which you'll hopefully see in the next couple of weeks.

I am in the process of contacting several spanking models, with a view to getting them to subject themselves to a few questions as well; we certainly try to cover all of the bases here!

In addition to all of this there will be at least one further paysite review this month, and hopefully that will give you some food for thought.

I am at various states of preparation
for my next two "Why I Like..." model appreciation pieces, and I think it's only a matter of time until I write my first spanker appreciation piece as well.

No one actually yelled at me for my film review of The Artist, so I may try and sneek in a couple of more vanilla posts; I've seen 4 of the 9 films nominated for the Best Film Oscar at time of writing.

I have a couple of opinion posts in various stages of completion, including one nearly ready to go which I think will be up on Monday (accompanied by a slew of handsome spanking piccies of course).

So, that's about it, I guess. I hope that there's something there to interest most of you, even if it's only the pictures of pretty girls with smacked bottoms.

Time for me to creep up the creaky stairs to bed I think; I have a traditional roast beef dinner to cook tomorrow at my son's request (I always prepare
whatever meal is requested in a birthday week). Of course, we went out for dinner tonight, and all ended up having steak, and Friday I cooked beef paprikash, so our colons will be stuffed with red meat by Monday.

I can feel my arteries hardening as I type.

Well, I'll be back soon.

All the best
Have a peaceful Sunday
May your God go with you (yeah, I stole that from Dave Allen).