Thursday, 30 October 2014

If spanking was genetic, would you let one marry your sister?

In common with many of you, I discovered a love of spanking as a fairly young child; I remember playing spanking games in infant school as a six year old.

I never wondered why spanking excited me so, despite spending time each day thinking about it. Clearly I was not a sexual being at that age, so the attraction lies some way beyond the prosaic erotic one.

As a child I was always aware that most of the people I knew and played with (in the general rather than spanko sense) had no interest in smacked bottoms. I remember reading Fantastic Four issue 164, which contained a reference to the Thing putting the Invisible Woman over his knee, and running to share this with my best friend, a fellow comic fan, who just shrugged. 

However there were always one or two whose eyes lit up at any mention of a spanking.

As far as I know neither of my parents had any interest in spanking; whilst I grew up when corporal punishment was still a popular tool they never really practised it, beyond the odd slap when I was quite young.

As far as I know neither of my children have any interest in spanking. We are pretty open about sexual relations, and my son felt able to share his urge towards bisexuality when he was 16, so I think I'd at least have an inkling. We are non-judgemental, and I suppose quite liberal.

In my case I don't think the spanking urge was passed down to me, and I can't see that I was unduly influenced by environmental factors as I grew up. I don't have a clue as to where my total fascination and basically life-changing obsession with spanking came from.

I regret, in many ways, that I didn't grow up 20 years or so later, as I think that there are more avenues available to the average spanko to practice his art now than has previously been the case. The proliferation of the internet has made it possible to safely link up with like minded individuals. It has also made contacting professionals easier.

I'm 51 years old. From the time I was 22 until 4 years ago I had never smacked the bottom of anyone other than my wife, and, whilst she seemed to be quite into it when we first started going out, over the years she has become less keen. During the last few years spanking has been confined to the bedroom, as a form of foreplay.

In a house with two teenagers our opportunities to indulge in any kind of noisy sex are severely limited.

I am hugely pleased that we now live in a society where most people accept the existence of gay men and women; while I accept that it's not always easy for some to come out to their loved ones the vicious and ugly abuse that was a norm even when I was young has decreased. I'm not sure it will ever entirely be eliminated, as, in the words of Game of Thrones "There's no cure for being a cunt" and some people just are. But most are better and more accepting.

Sadly, despite the increasing mainstream interest in spanking, I don't think that the average Daily Mail reader would be as tolerant if faced with a self confessed spankophile.

Some of this comes from the traditional image of spankers, as whip-wielding sadists, or ogre-like teachers mercilessly thrashing their charges with a bamboo rod. Spankees meanwhile are portrayed as spineless wimps, who get off on all types of physical and verbal abuse.

Now, you and I, old chum, know that this is not how we are. I struggle to explain my interest in spanking, but I know that I am neither sadist or masochist.

Spanking is, by definition, an act intended to provoke pain. It would be a pretty ineffectual punishment if it were not. I like spanking. I like to see spanking videos where the spankees clearly experience discomfort. Therefore I like pain. I am a sadist.

Like fuck I am. I like pain when administered either to the bottom of a woman, or administered by a woman to the bottom of a man. 

I do not like pain when administered any other way. I will happily watch a spanking model being given six of the best across her naked bottom. Try to show me even one stroke across her hands and I'll run in the opposite direction.

I love the sensation of being spanked. I love the slap of palm on (somewhat flabby) flesh. I love the heat, and sting. I warm to the splash of a paddle against my cheeks. I even quite enjoy the burning stripe of a cane across my bum. I thoroughly crave the ache I feel in the muscles of my buttocks for a couple of days after a thorough spanking. I enjoy the sensations traditionally associated with punishment. I like the pain. I am a masochist.

Bollocks to that. I like pain in my bottom. Nowhere else. I dislike being slapped on the thighs or legs whilst in role play. I regard face slapping as ridiculous and insulting. I suffer quite bad arthritis, to the extent that the joints in my little fingers have entirely eroded, so that they don't bend and the nerves have effectively burnt out. Believe me, this was a gradual painful process, and I got no pleasure from it at all. Well, not until the nerves gave up anyway.

So I'm not a sadist or a masochist. Where does my love of spanking come from?

As an older teenager I remember telling a girl I had spanked at a party (and subsequently went out with for several months) that I liked to spank as a reaction to having a dominant mother. In those days I was purely a top (although I had never heard of that as concept). This made a little sense to me.

I'm pretty sure that I was wrong. I liked to spank before it ever occurred to me that my Mom had a stronger personality than other moms. I've never been drawn to women of my Mom's physical type. 

A few years ago I became interested in being spanked. This came as a huge surprise to me, as it had never been anything I thought held any attraction for me. Perhaps seeing and reading about men being spanked on the internet provoked an interest. I think that, when I was young, the idea of what a man should be might have prevented me considering acting the more passive or submissive role.

I'm a few years past caring what anyone thinks of me, or what I do. I'm comfortable with my desires and needs. It could be that I was always inclined towards being a switch but that subconsciously I suppressed this until my conscious mind had matured enough to accept it.

Whatever the reasons for how I am, I really am comfortable with it. I accept that my fetish is outside the mainstream, but, largely through the internet, I have friends who share my needs. By pushing my comfort zone a bit further, and attending munches and spanking meets, there is the potential for me to develop real people relationships with fellow spankos, and perhaps even to play with some of them.

I'm still evolving.

It's taken me over fifty years to get this far. If, twenty years ago, I'd known what I know now, I'm sure I'd be more relaxed and confident now in dealing with spanking related issues, but that's just crying over burnt toast. Scraping off some of the blackened bits doesn't change what it is.

So, to return to the title of this post, or, more properly, to actually ask the question I hinted around, if one of your kids came to you and expressed an interest in spanking would you encourage them?

I find this an extremely difficult question. 

Firstly, I think that parents have a duty to support their kids, whether you agree with their choices or not.

I'm just not sure that, in every case, a spanking obsession is the beginning of the road to a happy and fulfilled life. I'm sure it is for some, but I think a lot of us lurkers find it impossible to satisfy our cravings sufficiently.

Yes, I'm happy with what I want. I'm not happy with the degree to which I can satisfy my needs. I've seen a couple of professional spankees this year, on maybe 6 or 7 occasions. Financially I've had quite a good year, up until 2 months ago when illness interrupted it, and I could afford this.

Next year things might be tighter. And it's not like I wouldn't have had many more sessions if I could have paid for them.

Some of you out there are in spanking relationships, and I'm entirely jealous of you. Lucky, lucky bastards.

One of you is Mike the Spanking Dutchman, and words cannot begin to describe the depths of my envy for him.

Some of you are financially independent (for which read wealthy) and can afford frequent visits to these ladies we spank (and/or who spank us). I'm pretty jealous of you too.

Some of you have never gotten to play with either a professional or real life partner; I feel sorry for you, but at least you don't know what you're missing.

I think that the saddest cases are those, like myself, who get to experience some spanking, but nowhere near enough, and who can't significantly change things.

Self pity? Why, yes, of course. But I'm stuck in a rut. 

Spanking is fun; it can be emotionally and physically satisfying. It may be a route to sexual pleasure. 

It's not always easy though. I suspect that, for most of us, a spanking obsession has uncomfortable elements.

I confess that I'm happy that my parents aren't aware of my fascination with c.p. None of my friends, outside of the few I've made within the scene, are either. It makes for an easier life.

They say that you don't regret what you do, only what you don't. I'm not sure I entirely accept that, but I admit that it's the opportunities I've either never had, or else that I've let pass me by, that hurt the most. These are the ones that haunt me, and sometimes cost me sleep.

Would I recommend spanking? As a lifetime fascination? 

Nah. I don't think so.

But my life would be a greyer, colder place without it. At times writing this blog has kept me going when other things have made life seem a bit too much trouble.

I know that, however fed up I may be, I can log onto my PC and watch a few of my favourite spanking videos, and be taken to a more charming place.

It's not a perfect life, but it has it's compensations.

Are you glad that you're a spanko?

All the best

Tim

Pictures taken from Real Life Spanking, courtesy of the generosity of Mike the Spanking Dutchman. None of them are strictly relevant to the words, but it's nice to distract you from what I'm actually saying when I start to make less sense than usual.

All images feature the spectacularly gorgeous Leandra, just because I like watching her being spanked.






Paysite review (two for the price of one!) - The Institute of Discipline/The Lazy Maid

Believe me, I appreciate just how you feel. When I mentioned doing a website review you took it with a pinch of salt, just an empty promise as likely to be fulfilled as that of a Conservative Government asserting that they would properly fund the NHS.

However, the faith of the few who muttered "give him time" has been rewarded; here, for your pleasure and education, is a review of not one but two spanking paysites. 

And there was much rejoicing in the Spanking Nation.
Although Eve and Katie don't seem so happy

Or probably a gentle ripple of apathy, but what the fuck - it's my blog and I'll imagine that it's important if I want to. If you'll pardon my anglo-saxon (the offending word having been in use in Britain since at least the 1830's).

Gliding swiftly back to the point; these two websites are part of what I tend to call "the Miss Strickland sites", although more properly I think that The Institute of Discipline may be the lead site, as everything else, including The Lazy Maid, are linked from it.

I can't keep typing all of that though so hopefully you'll forgive me if I refer to them as IoD and LM.

The majority of sites in the group focus on women spanking (and belting and caning) men; these two are the only purely women on the bottom sites here (some of the others have the odd clip of ladies being punished).

The IoD costs £22.79 for a month and LM costs £18.93. There is no option to join multiple sites at a discount but, refreshingly, the memberships are not recurring ones, which, to me, seems to face the reality that most spankos tend to stay with any given site for a month before moving on.

Could be that's just me though.
Katie spanks Miranda

Videos on the two sites tend to be a bit interchangeable; IoD is nominally a school based site, and does have lots of school girl spankings, while LM revolves around the spanking of domestic servants. Neither site exclusively feature these things though.

Each site has in the region of 150 distinct videos, each being between 5 and 10 minutes long. Some of the older videos, especially on some of the other sites, are a bit shorter.

Image quality on all except the oldest clips is fine, with everything shot in HD. Some older clips are also occasionally converted to the higher quality medium. Sound is clear and clean.

The sites appear to be updated weekly, with a fresh video.
Vicky over Tamara's knee - very nearly my idea of Heaven

The girls being spanked are lovely; there seems to be a pool of ladies who operate across all of the sites in the group, and who, as a result, tend to both spank and be spanked. As you know I love to see turnabout, and many of my favourite scenes in the wide world of spanking feature the spanker being punished in her turn.

This is also true of the role plays I enjoy when playing; one of the obvious joys of being a switch, of course.

Some ladies appear more often than others, with Michelle Monroe, Vicky Carter, Lisa Burcham, Tamara Kenworthy and Katie Stricktland being probably the most often seen. Some of these are more top than bottom (such as the gorgeous Tamara, who only gets spanked twice, sadly).
Tamara gets it! Just not often enough

The majority of the spankings are carried out by Miss Stricktland, although other ladies are also involved. Katie herself is spanked in several clips, generally by a guy who appears as a bottom on the femdom sites (and who I believe is her partner).

There are a lot of hand spankings, especially over the knee (and of course I give a huge cheer for this), but also plenty of slipperings, canings and beltings. Hairbrushes are quite popular too. 
Same again from a different angle

Plot lines are fairly minimal; usually a very brief explanation of the girl who is to be spanked's faults is given, and then she is promptly taken over a knee or bent over a desk.

The degree of punishment varies wildly, from extremely mild looking spankings to quite severe canings. Often films show progressive punishment, with two or three implements being employed.
Even Katie gets spanked sometimes

There are several things I particularly enjoy about the films on offer on these two sites:-

1. as mentioned above, it's lovely to see these ladies who deal with men so harshly on the femdom sites actually on the receiving end for a change

2. really good use of angles when filming; these include the usual straight on and bottom orientated shots, but also add shots from behind the spanker, from below and above. If anything this is more noticeable on the femdom sites but is quite refreshing.

3. a lot of emphasis on the faces of the spankees, often angled so that you can see the strokes being delivered too

4.  schoolgirls bending over school desks - a particular penchant of mine, for some reason
Yes, just like this!

5. the directness; I enjoy a video that tells a story, establishes character, setting and mood (such as Pandora does at Dreams of Spanking) but sometimes it's great just to meet the girl and get to the spanking. 

6. lots of spanked ladies rubbing their punished bottoms, which I find to be a particular turn on.




Do you think five examples is enough?

Are these sites perfect? No, because I have yet to find the perfect site, and as it would have to match my particular kink exactly, I doubt that I'll ever see it (unless I win the Lottery and set up my own paysite, that is).

There could do with being more variety of spankers, and there definitely needs to be more of Miss Kenworthy being spanked.
The lovely Miss Monroe gets spanked, as Miranda waits her turn

While I list the brevity of the clips as a positive, sometimes I find I'd like just a little more build up.

The site does a good job of showing how the girls feel about the spankings that they are receiving, but sometimes the reaction is exaggerated too far, with tears almost from the beginning of the punishment. Bearing in mind that many of these ladies are spanked quite frequently, some of this is over the top.

Some of the reactions are clearly genuine though, and if you are one of those spanking fans who like to see tears, there are films here that show that level of punishment, including several with Katie Stricktland on the receiving end.

So, do I recommend these sites to you? As I keep finding myself returning to the clips, I have to say that I do. Certainly there are sites out there with many more clips, and a greater variety of storylines, but many of the films here I find to be particularly appealing.

Hopefully you'll get a small taste of the reason why from the pictures posted here (all of which are my screen grabs, hence their sometimes marginal quality).

I'd suggest that if you do have a look you start with IoD, as I like the clips there marginally more. The largely interchangeable nature of the two sites (which could easily be combined, although this would result in less income of course) makes it unnecessary to sample both. Of course, if you like one set of films you'll almost certainly want to see the others too.

I hope that you found this review to be of interest; these sites don't seem to be mentioned often, and they are worth a look. I suspect they have a loyal group of regular subscribers.

All the best

Tim

All pictures used for review purposes and taken from IoD and the LM.


Wednesday, 29 October 2014

Pandora Blake goes to Holland

It was another late night with the World Series this morning, but at least there's only one more game to go. And yes, I realise that baseball is "the American Game" (according to Walt Whitman), and I'm English, but I just find it compelling. Also baseball just has a different dynamic to every other team sport, as even the best team will always lose 40 or 50 games each season. Every other major team sport offers the possibility of being undefeated.

Well look, I may be lazy (and for may be, feel free to read "certainly bloody is") but I'm not dim. I thoroughly enjoyed doing the Dani Hunt post, and it was relatively little work.

I therefore have a plan; it's not a grand design, and it's certainly not as cunning as a fox with a degree in cunning from Oxford University (which line my memory insists I've lifted or possibly paraphrased, from Blackadder) but it is a viable way of filling up this blog on the days when anything new, original or compelling entirely defeats me. Or I'm just too bloody tired.

I am therefore preparing a series of these posts, based around some of our (or at least my) favourite spanking models and their work in Amsterdam with Mike the Spanking Dutchman. Most pictures will come from Spanked in Uniform, as Real Life Spanking is mostly reserved for amateurs.

Here then is number two in our series, featuring the wonderful Pandora Blake, whose own site, Dreams of Spanking, seems to go from strength to strength.

Enough words; I don't want to strain your eyes. On to the pretty pictures!






The rather attractive Miss Blake; before the spankings start




Mike swings into action; that really is Pandora, despite the blurry "moved as I grabbed it" quality



Reaching back will not save you from the wrath of Mike!



The pinkness of this outfit is entirely out of Pandora's control (the impending pinkness of her bottom is also something she is unable to prevent)



Yes, as we've established, Mike has a hard hand



Watch out, watch out, Amelia's about!



Everyone cheer! It's Pandora's rear! (And if that doesn't prove that I'm lazy today nothing will)



Oh look - a slap and grab



I love this expression; I only wish that I had the chance to cause it myself



Oh, I dunno. Whack? What do you mean, that's not original?



I think we'll have to table out discussions about this one! Okay, nearly time to finish 'cos these comments are going from bad to worse



It's the end of this post as we know it. And it's also Pandora's rear end, looking particularly lovely in black knickers.

And that's all we have time for, spanking fans. Hurry back; I've got a bag load of these things, and the puns just get worse and worse. Please leave all critical faculties at the door.

All the best

Tim

Tuesday, 28 October 2014

My name is Tim the Tum, and I'm a spanking wimp

Just got back from one of my regular meetings at Spanking Wimps Anonymous, and I felt that it was time to come out to all of you. That's right - despite the brave face that I strive to present to the spanking community, I am a spanking wimp.

I suppose it should have been obvious from the very beginning; when I played spanking games as a child I only gave half dozen or so spanks each time.

I went through my school years terrified I'd be spanked, slippered or caned (in those unenlightened years before physical institutionalised bullying was outlawed).

When I got my first PC at the beginning of the nineties and first discovered the spanking internet I only looked for mainstream spanking material; tame, over clothes and often in black and white.

After a few years I became a little bolder, and joined my first spanking paysite. It was Spanking over Skirts. and it's blend of very mild spankings usually over clothed bottoms was a huge turn on for me, at the time. Not that I would recommend it now.

Then I took a tumble, falling over my own tiptoeing feet. I joined Girls Boarding School, the home of brutal abusive corporal punishment, usually inflicted by heavy handed Germans who seemed to treat the girls they beat with utter contempt.

Chastened by the experience I retreated to safer shores.

I actually got to the point where I watched videos only until the point where the pants came down; I didn't care for bare bottomed spankings at all. They looked far too painful!

And as for implements? Shudder. Quite liked the slipper and, oddly, the wooden paddle when applied over jeans (probably as I couldn't see the considerable damage that it was doing), but nothing else. Especially not the cane, which horrified me.

As an adult, for many years the only bottom that I had spanked was my wife's, and, as she isn't really a spanko, these spankings were always mild. When I suddenly decided that I wanted her to spank me the result was fairly similar,

Over the years I had seen a wider range of spanking films, and my tolerance levels had increased, a bit, but I still became a little freaked at glowing red bottoms, and the very suggestion of bruises or other marks.

I didn't think that there was anything wrong with this. I was not yet ready to admit that I had a problem; mild spankings were great, and I could give them up anytime that I liked.

Then I had a breakthrough, with the help of a lovely lady called Winks. If you venture back in my archive you'll find a two-part, rather detailed account of our meeting, but the two most important parts were these:-

1. When I whacked away at her bottom, for the very first time, she told me that I could smack harder than that if I liked. But her bottom was already starting to go red!

2. After she turned the tables on me she suggested that I examine my bottom in the mirror. It was glowing a fiery red, and it was sore but not hugely, and I was having a good time!

I had an epiphany. A bright red bare and well smacked bottom does not mean that the recipient is in agony. Bottoms go red very easily. And spanking models exaggerate the discomfort that they are in (take a look at any of the Wellspanked clips on Spanking Tube - lovely films with attractive girls but they start crying as soon as the first couple of smacks fall).

So then, I was able to confess it - I am a spanking wimp.

There were steps I could take to help cure me of this dreadful affliction. Not twelve steps, admittedly, but a handful. 

1. Rewatch spanking videos with a more realistic eye.

2. Try to play with professionals more, and spank harder. See how they react; even talk to them about how it feels (and ignore them when they tell you that no one has ever spanked them harder - that'll be crap)

3. Try to play with professionals more, and get them to push your limits when you get spanked. It helps if you session with one person a few times (Hi Cherri) as they will learn what you can take, and then push on gradually from there.

4. Just relax and enjoy; when playing if you go too hard your partner will tell you.

5. Don't try to spank your partner's bottom up through their spine; start mildly, maybe with a cupped hand, and build.

6. Never underestimate the benefits of a warm up spanking.

So each time I play I try to bear all of this in mind; I spank harder now (over a period of time), and I take a far harder spanking with enjoyment.

Am I cured? No, I'll always be a spanking wimp. I put Dani Hunt over my knee and slippered her, only for her to ask that I gave her a slippering. I was so gentle she thought that I'd used my hand!

I'm never going to be a hugely hard spanker; Dallas can rest easy with no fear of my competition. 

When I watch videos I do now enjoy it when I see what I judge to be genuine reaction; I like to see a bottom go gradually red, and I love it when a spankee leaps to her feet and clutches her bottom.

I even quite liking seeing the odd caning, provided it's not too hard. While I like seeing ladies spanking men, I hate to see them caning, as the beatings are still way to violent for my taste. When I see femdom stuff I often imagine I'm the one being spanked, and, while I have taken the odd six of the best or so, I have no interest in the level of pain a severe thrashing would generate.

This is not my idea of fun (although Cassie Hunter is gorgeous)

I've commented on this before; when I read on the forums of guys paying for 60 or 80 or 100 or more strokes of the cane I take my hat off to them. If it's your thing then good luck to you.

I'm a wimp at heart. I'll stick to 10 minutes or so across a fetching lap, with my bottom growing red and just a little bruised under the hand of a kindred soul.

I suppose that in some ways I am exactly the type of client a professional switch wants; I still don't spank too hard, I'm imaginative in role plays (now that I've done a few more) and I don't want my partner to exhaust themselves on my bottom. And, unless I get a nose bleed from excitement, there won't be any blood to clean up (I should just say that I don't get nose bleeds - this line is purely for dramatic effect. And now I've ruined it entirely).

Is any of this familiar to you? Do you cower in terror at the lashings some pros feel they have to give. When the spankee over your knee cries "harder" do you whine "but my hand hurts"? 

If so we have the answer. SWA. Spanking Wimps Anonymous. No government affiliation, and there's bound to be a meeting near you. Call our toll free number for details.

You know what I want right now? A really good spanking. Still, there's a meeting this afternoon - I'll be alright.

All the best

Tim

PS pictures are from Cassie Canes, the Institute of Discipline and Punished Brats, and have no immediate relevance to this post, except that I quite liked them (and you can't have too much of Leia)